I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
