Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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