I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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