Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
