remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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