You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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