In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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