If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize