Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
