Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Randomize
