This girl is more easily done than said...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
