you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I want a musical about memes.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
