I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize