Where is the hickey?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
