I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
