so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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