he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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