I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
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