why didn't you poke me back
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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