one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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