Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
