Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Randomize