you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
