So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
