I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
