Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
