Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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