Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize