Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
