Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
