we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just pee around me
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
