Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
