Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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