haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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