I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
