My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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