Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
