I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I had to cum in my sink.
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