seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize