I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I need a hoe opinion
go on
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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