Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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