super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize