dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
