Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
