are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
