I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
