Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
