Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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