I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
How does one acquire holy water?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
