I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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