That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
