FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Randomize